Is it really Ruby Tuesday again already? I had a lovely three-day weekend for President's Day filled with many walks and games of tug, outings with friends and family, braving crowds at Colorado's first Trader Joe's, and attending the Colorado Kennel Club dog show. I also did a lot of thinking about the many honest and wonderful posts about reactive dogs that I have read recently. I think we can all see now that we are definitely not alone with our challenging dogs, and that it's a never-ending process of learning, management, and taking the bad days with the good. I had a little of each this weekend...
On Friday my office closed early, so I had a rare weekday opportunity to walk Ruby in the remaining late-afternoon and evening light. It was not the smartest idea to take her across the busy street at rush hour, but after running the crosswalk gauntlet there are some generally-quiet neighborhoods to walk in with wide, hilly, winding streets. Luck was not on our side as two motorcycles passed us immediately waiting for the pedestrian light to change. That set the tone for the entire venture, and while I did my best to practice calming ovals, "watch me" and zig-zag walking, Ruby's attention was gone. We saw a few other people walking, a cyclist, and a barking dog behind a fence. I felt for the most part like I didn't exist at the other end of the leash. Even though I know better, it's hard not to take it personally. I feel safer carrying her across the street since it's so busy, and even though I clip her collar and harness together, I know that if she got away from me in one of her frenzies she'd be in very real danger of being run over. I'm sure the motorists at the red light wonder why on earth I'm carting my twenty pound dog across the street, probably thinking she's spoiled and I'm an idiot. Usually I don't care what they think, but after our harrowing walk I was relieved just to be on the other side of the noise-barrier wall, away from judgmental eyes and back in the safety of our townhome complex. Not wanting to end our outing on that disappointing note, we went up to the second-story concrete balcony of the clubhouse and watched the birds and rabbits below as the sound of the nearby freeway rushed like a concrete river and the sun started to set in pastel tones. Even at times like that I don't wish for a different dog...I wish for a quieter life. I grew up in the country and though I love my city and all it has to offer, I do think of how happy Ruby would be somewhere she could run free without all the fears and frustrations that she has to deal with in our crowded suburban setting. Although I felt much better back home, Ruby was still amped up and distracted, exacerbated by seeing a few dogs out the front window. I knew she would not be able to focus on the tasks of our current Relaxation Protocol session, so I decided to repeat Day 1. She got through it and I was really glad I chose to set her up for success. You do what you can...sometimes stepping back or to the side is not defeat.
I spent the Sunday at the Rocky Mountain Cluster dog show. I have gone every year since I found out about it (six or seven years running, I think) and while I have mixed feelings about purebred trends and show politics, I never tire of seeing so many beautiful, happy dogs in one place. I try to never miss the Norwegian Elkhound judging, just so I can see all those gorgeous silver coats, cinnamon-bun tails and sparkling dark chocolate drop eyes, and toothy elkie smiles. I got to love on one nice young female and missed my Freya immensely. I bought a new tug toy for Ruby - a rectangle of faux fur and canvas with some squeakers stitched in on a purple nylon webbing strap. I watched a flyball demonstration - something I'd never heard of until getting Ruby, when I learned that Border Jacks are deliberately crossed for the sport - and it was both incredible and unexpectedly touching. The dogs were so excited for their turns - it was just a cacophony of barking as the team members flew over the hurdles, jumped on to the spring-loaded ball box, and raced the ball delightedly back to their handlers. I actually found myself getting a bit choked up at the joy, energy and intensity of it all. We also watched the agility trials in the big arena for quite a while. The competition was dominated by shelties and heelers, but the most entertaining run was a Basenji who, after much encouragement, finally strolled through a few of the weave poles, than stopped when it heard the crowd clapping, seemingly pausing to bask in the attention, then sauntered through the rest of the course in no great hurry. I was delighted to spot a Laekenois - such a cool-looking curly shepherd and something you don't see every day - but left before it had its turn.
Once home, Ruby and I played a game of tug with her new toy. She still seems to prefer what is left of her Walk-e-Woo tug, which is now just an orange nylon strap with a loop at each end, but she enjoyed the squeakers in her dog show souvenir. It was absolutely gorgeous outside, and while tempting to brave the busy street or the open space, I wanted to ensure that we had a fun and relaxing time so we stayed close to home. I took her to the lawn and basketball court of the adjacent complex, where they have some pleasant benches to sit on near their community garden. Ruby dug a hole and snuffled in the dirt next to a tree, and it was so nice to see her being a dog. Her body language was loose, she had a wide panting grin, and I could tell the sunshine was doing us both good. Some kids had left two soccer balls out on the lawn, so I began kicking one around for Ruby to chase. It was tricky to keep up with her on leash, but she absolutely loved the game - I may have to get her a soccer ball of her own! We did see some other dogs and people out in the unseasonably beautiful
weather, but were able to keep our distance without issue. We wandered around, smiling all the while, she dug another hole, I took some pictures, then we returned home to relax on the sofa with the last of the afternoon light slanting in. Ruby has an adorable habit of covering my face with kisses after we've done something fun, and I got a lot of love after our walk. I felt so happy and content, having just seen all the most talented, decorated dogs in the region, and still thinking mine was the very best one, my heart's blue ribbon.
Sounds like you had a lot of fun at the dog show!
ReplyDeleteHaha, I love the tug description (now just a nylon strap with a loop on the end) - we have a few toys that fit that description... although often it's "now just pieces of (insert material here) that dogmom is picking up off the floor so they're not consumed". I mean, are empty toilet paper rolls really that delicious?
ReplyDeleteI see a few people cross not so busy streets carrying their dogs. I don't blame them or judge them one bit. Sometimes it's just safer. Who cares if people think it's crazy? They are probably the same kind of people that think picking up dog poop is gross and would rather leave it there for someone else to deal with and/or step in.
ReplyDeleteWhat a jam-packed weekend!
What an action packed weekend!
ReplyDeleteYou've inspired me to check out our local fairgrounds for dog shows! Just an idea: I bought an extra large Flexi belt leash (26 ft) http://www.amazon.com/Explore-Retractable-26-Feet-Supports-110-Pound/dp/B005NK5DEU/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1392763735&sr=8-3&keywords=flexi+belt Just so that I can take Stella to the park or beach to run around. Much like you did with the soccer ball. I don't walk her with it though. Its super long!
ReplyDeleteI'm not generally a fan of Flexi leads but that may be just the ticket for that sort of play! I bought her a 50 foot training line (WAY too long!) to practice recall in a vacant field nearby, but she was afraid of it dragging it on the ground so that was a total disaster.
DeleteI agree, Im not a fan either. Stella puts on her backpack with the flexi in one pocket and her Wubbas in the other pocket. and we go to the park :) she carries her own gear.
DeleteDo you notice the backpack helping Stella at all as far as focus/reactivity? That's yet another thing I want to try with Ruby. We have so many nice parks nearby that are big and open enough to be able to keep our distance but the hard part is the walk or drive to get there.
DeleteI actually do! Plus it burns a tad more energy. Also when I have her fleece jacket on I feel like she is more focused. I feel like it has a similar effect as a thundershirt would (which I might buy). I know Ive been writing about this a lot lately, but have you used a Gentle Leader? Did you see the responses on Reactive Dogs? Im going to try it tonight, but the first time I did I had a little more control with Stellas reactivity. It was like a 7 minute stroll around a parking lot though. Just to see if she would mind it.
DeleteWow, that's so cool! Ruby has a Thundershirt, we use it mainly for car rides. I walked her in it once and didn't notice a huge difference. I used a Halti exclusively for my Elkhound, have one for Ruby. Haltis are similar to Gentle Leaders, but I like it better in that it has a security clip for the collar and the side pieces more like a horse halter. There is some discussion in the R+ community that head collars have an aversive element (I think *any* restraint does if you want to get down to the nitty gritty but we have to be realistic and keep them safe out in the world somehow), and I do think that if Ruby gets riled up, the Halti makes it worse. Once she even got it stuck on her lower jaw during a freak-out when a loose dog ran up to us, which certainly didn't help matters. If we are able to keep our distance, it really does offer more control and focus. It's all such a balancing act. Lately I've been using the back clip of a Freedom harness and liking that quite a bit. Ruby seems her happiest with that set-up. I do want to utilize the Halti more if we are braving some busier areas - Friday's walk probably would have gone better with some different equipment. It's nice that there are so many different options available now.
DeleteYea, Im just going to have to dig in and see how it goes. eeck! I dont want the experience that you had. I guess that is my fear! Crazy what we have to go through with all this experimentation! Ill let you know how it works out for me. I have to admit, Im a little nervous... she is a strong little bugger!! But Ill hook it to her regular collar. Andy and I were joking the other day... might as well put all the equipment on her at the same time and see if they work together. that would be a thundershirt, a no pull harness, a gentle lead, a no jump harness, a spray collar for barking, a muzzle, and her backpack! all kidding and we dont have all that but it FEELS like we are constantly trying everything we can!!
DeleteCarrying your dog is a terrific solution! (I wish I could carry Leo, but he weighs 98 pounds!)
ReplyDeleteI love that you ended on a good note by watching birds and rabbits. I've had moments like that. I remember one vividly when Isis was still alive and we had to keep her and Leo separated. The whole arrangement was really taking a toll on me, and then one day, I sat in the backyard next to Leo and just watched him watching the world, his mouth hanging open and the breeze in his face. It reminded me to live in the present moment. And in that moment, life was good.
I think having to keep dogs separate must be so difficult. I've read of it being necessary on a few different blogs I follow. My previous two dogs had three bad fights in the nine years they were together, and while they got along 99% of the time, there was always that bit of tension and very careful management on my part. It was enough to make me consider not ever having multiple dogs again, and part of the reason I want to foster instead of adopting a second dog.
DeleteAll that said - yes...they certainly do remind us to take stock of the now, don't they? I feel like my recovery time is getting shorter - where it used to bum me out for days if we had a bad walk, I'm usually over it within an hour or less now. Ruby is just too cute and energetic for me to stay mopey :)
I am thankful, too, that I have the option of carrying Ruby. She's just on the edge of it being comfortable, having gained about five pounds since I got her, but it is one benefit to my first smaller dog.
DeleteWe all have good days and bad days. How smart of you to set Ruby up for success by taking a step back on the Relaxation Protocols.
ReplyDeleteSorry your work is so frustrating. I hope you someday have the home environment that makes you and Ruby feel good.
Personally, I'm a big city lover. One reason is because pedestrians become their own force and gain a few rights. People think suburbs are great for getting away from city stress. But they're made for cars, not for people. And they're very hard to walk around.
BTW, loved seeing Ruby's pretty face over at the Wordless Wednesday blog hop on BlogPaws. As the page loaded I said to myself, "Hey, I know that dog!" :)
Sure do enjoy your Ruby posts! Not only is Ruby adorable, your writing is great too! And, your journeys with a reactive dog sound so similar to the experiences I've had with my heeler/corgi, Idgie. We're fortunate to live in the mountains and can enjoy lots of unstressful walks, but in this environment, the smallest thing--a bicyclist riding by--can seem exaggerated and extreme. What seemed to work best is a drive to the dog park with hours of unleashed dog play and interaction, literally until Idgie was so tired he was sitting down on his own, and then taking an immediate on-leash walk in the busy downtown area next to the dog park. Maybe he's too tired to react after all the play, and maybe it boosts his sense of security, but whatever happens, he's definitely calmer on walks after this routine. I can even take him into a pet store afterwards--something I would've thought impossible--something that is impossible without the dog park warm-up. During one of these post-dog-park walks, three dogs even ran up to us, and Idgie didn't make a sound and hardly reacted at all! It was a miracle. We don't often make the drive into the dog park anymore because it's so far, but we definitely stop there first before making any long road trips. It makes the difference of having a calm, quiet ride compared to having an off-the-wall bouncing & nervous, verbal one! Thanks for your posts, Lara.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your nice comment, Suzan.
DeleteOh, how I long for a quiet mountain home these days. Ruby no longer goes to the dog park - I fear it may have contributed to her issues, and since it is normally filled with big dogs they tend to gang up on her. She loves to be chased, but not to be caught. I do certainly notice a difference on walks if she's had a chance to burn energy some other way before, though.
Somehow I missed this post in my woefully-behind feed reader.
ReplyDeleteI am SO sympathetic to that desire to move out to the country. I told the behaviorist one day that Silas wouldn't have any problems at all if we had 20 acres and a privacy fence. She laughed and told me that most of her clients wouldn't. Seriously, though, Silas just can't handle the noise here. Ambient traffic noise and sirens are weirdly okay, but anything past that is hard for him. With his medication, he's only reacting to noises on the audible-to-humans spectrum, which is a huge improvement. We've also finally got him to not bark at people leaving the restaurant down the street in the middle of the night, thank goodness.
Still, it is never quiet here. We're two small blocks from a high school, across the street from a church, down the street from a day care. People park in front of our house for shops and restaurants. Even when we go to the park, it's a city park with traffic noise. (I would happily pay the fees to use the rural state parks, but Silas is so reactive to people reaching toward the car that I'm afraid they would turn us away at the gate.) One of the reasons he's so particular about his route through his favorite park is that it gets too close to the freeway (the busiest stretch in town) on the back side. You can't see the cars, but boy can you hear them.
We could afford to move to the suburbs, and my husband's commute would be pretty equivalent. But with a reactive dog and no kids in the suburbs *I* will be completely isolated--we've done it before, pre-Silas, and it was miserable. Plus most of the suburbs here don't allow fully-fenced yards.
So I just stay here and hope something magically changes. And, like you, cherish the good days when they happen.
You know, I was thinking of you and Silas last night when Ruby had a complete freak-out over...I don't know what. She was running around the house, doing high-pitched fits of barking, unlike anything she's ever done. It took her so long to calm down. What was different? My neighbors across the alley I think have a fire-pit or something on their patio - it causes their place to flicker, and in fact the first time I saw it I thought their place was on fire. Ruby has definitely noticed/been bothered by that before, but nothing like last night. We also have a doggie house-guest, and he was definitely worried about something, too, though in the opposite direction, staring out the front window. Also it was snowing. Still none of that seems to equate to the level of distress Ruby was experiencing. It was really disheartening. She finally curled up to sleep, seeming exhausted by her panic.
DeleteI'm lucky that although I live in a high-density complex, it's relatively quiet. Ruby isn't normally too bothered by the landscaping noise, and I have quiet, retired neighbors on each side. We do have more dogs around, in the building across the lawn, than I've ever noticed previously, one lady that seems to take pleasure in walking her dog past our window and lingering as long as possible while Ruby loses her mind.
I'm becoming more and more of an introvert these days - the country is sounding increasingly appealing.
To both of you... Im struggling with my guilt of not taking Stella for walks as much as I used to... Its so incredibly stressful for me, and stressful for her. I don't think either of us enjoy it. So it leaves us to play in the back yard, I swear she never sees the front of the house. We do play fetch, and Frisbee back there but I cant help but feel incredibly guilty that she has a house and backyard life, with the occasional ride in the car. Do you struggle with this too? Do they really care? Sometimes I feel like "little dog, you have SUCH a better life then most dogs who get no attention" and that makes me feel a little better. She does go to daycare, but most other days its just us hanging with us in the house.
DeleteIt sounds to me like Stella has a pretty full life, especially with daycare! I only have small, fenced patio - would so love a safe place that Ruby could run around. There is a securely-fenced baseball field we've discovered recently not too far away. I think dogs love walks that aren't stressful, and that means different things for different dogs. Sometimes Ruby and I just take a ten minute walk around the common area (large lawn and picnic area near the pool and clubhouse of my townhome complex). Stella is loved and well-taken care of - I don't think she's feeling like she's missing out on anything.
DeleteTrue true! :) I guess this gloomy weather is bringing me down! First rainy day in a while! Cant take little miss princess in this weather anyway. She hates it!
ReplyDelete